I haven't gotten the slightest clue what you're talking about.
[Which is lie, there's an undeniable lightness to his step that he can't possibly hide. He's acting as if he's 21 again and fate seems to be in his reach to change it for a better future. His mood had been chipper courtesy of someone giving him chocolates, fresh batches from the kitchen they had said. He ate them all within the day, it would not only be impolite to not eat them but also he can indirectly support fellow workers in the kitchen.
Ever since then, the heaviness in his heart disappear into thin air. When he's close enough to Mallory, Luna wraps his arms around his friend. He hasn't seen him all day, and his first instinct is just to envelope him to a loving embrace.]
I just happen to have met the loveliest lady I've have seen in some time.
[His flutters when he remembers her, recalling how much her charm can be so enticing.]
[His happiness has always been so contagious. It's always been like a drug that Mal just couldn't have enough of, but in recent years it had become so scarce and valuable that even the slightest dose just left him craving it more and more before the high was even over. Luna's smile is like the sun, banishing the darkness that's been clouding Mal's heart all evening, enough to take his mind off his self-loathing, off his fight with the only person he might have been forming a friendship with here, off how damn lonely he was on Valentine's Day-
-and when Luna hugs him, everything dissipates from his mind. A cacophony of new ones come flooding in all at once, making his head spin.
He's warm. This is strange, isn't it? He smells so clean. Is this the real Luna? Did he discover who left him those chocolates? Did Riye figure Mal out and tell on him? Let this last forever. Does he really deserve this after everything he's done? Don't let go. Please don't let go.
I love you so much.
He can feel his heart pounding in his ears, and a trembling hand reaches up to clutch at the back of Luna's shirt. Maybe it's the residual drunkenness, but he could just kiss him right now. He really could!
[Just as he turns his head to act on that daring idea, Luna speaks.
I just happened to have met the loveliest lady. . .
The rest is drowned out by... something. Maybe it's his pulse again, but instead of the pleasant warmth spreading through his body seconds before, his blood runs icy cold.
What about Yukizome? An age-old resentment bubbles up inside of him, and he wants so badly to tell himself that it's righteous indignation for the honour of his other best friend, but there's another thought that accompanies it. What about ME?
No-
He knew better. He always knew better. He wants to laugh, or scream or something, but he just kind of stares blankly ahead, his grip on Luna's shirt loosening. He is a little shocked that he's gone and moved on so quickly, but... it's not like he wants to see him in sorrowful mourning forever, either.
So what ABOUT me, his heart screams, and he does his best to ignore it. This is about Luna. About Luna. Everything's always been about Luna.]
...Oh...?
[That's the most he can force out right now. He doesn't actually want to hear any more of it. Not tonight. Please.]
[He nods, closing his eye as he recalls the encounter in the library. It had been rather quiet, with Riye excusing herself to go to the employee kitchen for awhile, which he's fine covering for her for the time being. He finish shelving books that by the time she came, he's actually taking a break and reading up some old favorites while the library had been near to empty.]
She was initially lost, but then she stayed after we started discussing various topics and interests. She even gave me some chocolates she had on hand, I couldn't possibly refused.
[It's surprising to find someone paler than he is, but he could remember the contrasting pale skin against long, dark hair. The air around her just had beauty and elegance he has never seen before, not in the way she has.
Yukizome had been an unstoppable sunshine, but perhaps, within age, he needed someone whose more serene. His voices grows softer as he holds Mallory tightly.]
I didn't think I'd found someone so soon, but I suppose it's similar to you and Riye, we suddenly hit off so well quickly.
[Of all the times to finally get to feel those strong arms around him, it feels more like they're wrapping directly around his heart and squeezing the life out of it. He needs space. He needs air. He's trying desperately to listen to what Luna's saying but his focus on the words keeps swimming in and out. Something about him and Riye? What does that even... oh... that's what Luna thinks, huh?
He's going to be sick.
His mouth is so, so dry that it's a struggle to swallow down the lump in his throat, and when he finally manages it just feels more uncomfortable than before. He pats Luna a little too firmly on the back a few times.]
Hey, that's- great. I'm glad to hear it. You lucky dog.
[Like reading words off a prompter. Lying to Luna's nothing new. He needs to get out of here before the cracks begin to show again.]
--Oh, crap. Speaking of Riye... [You would not believe how badly I fucked up tonight.] I think I forgot my wallet when we went out earlier. Tell me all about this girl when I get back.
[Except don't, not really. Mal's not going to be in any particular hurry to get back, but at least he'll have taken the time to calm himself down and accept that this is the way things are and always will be.]
[He finally releases Mallory from the embrace, though his hand automatically goes for the former boxer's good hand. Luna doesn't seem to realize it he's doing it, he's just going with whatever feeling urges him to do so for once and he figures his friend wouldn't mind much.
He's excited to just talk more of the wonderful women he has the pleasure of meeting earlier today, his heart's ready to burst from just thinking about her and at the very least he wants to confide it to Mallory.]
Have you checked through our room and your pockets? It would be, well, unfortunate if it turns out it's been here all along.
[The grip he has on his friend's hand wavers a bit. He's hesitant of letting him go just yet.]
[Why... why is he doing this? Why now? Does he have any idea how much this hurts? Of course he doesn't. He only sees the bed of roses and only Mal can feel the thorns. On top of his disastrous dinner with Riye, this is all too much for him to take in one day.
He never thought he'd be the one to pull his hand away from Luna's.]
No no, I remember exactly where I left it.
[He knows he never had it with him in the first place, only loose change.]
I'll be back.
[He can promise that much. He just can't say when.]
[It's strange, for him to feel simultaneously heavy with grief but also like he's floating right out the door. Like he isn't even the one ushering his body down the hall, just to get him out of there, get him anywhere right now. Anything but to deal with this. If only he could wake up tomorrow and the whole day was just a dream.
He's still stunned that Luna could move on so quickly, especially since they lived in the shadow of the very real possibility that Chisa could just show up one day. It didn't feel real that Luna would cast her aside so quickly.
It didn't feel real when he tossed him aside, either.
That's right... For so long he thought that the bonds the three of them shared were unbreakable, but all it had taken was a single day for the pillars built by years of love to be crushed to dust. This was the real Luna, wasn't it? So ambitious and willing to do whatever he had to for his ideals that he would cast aside even those he called his trusted friends as soon as they stopped being useful to them.
And damn it all, Mal's still so desperate to prove that he can still be of use.
Riye said something about being put on a pedestal, didn't she? How many years had Mal raised Luna so high above himself that he was too distant to notice the cracks?
Suddenly the silence of the first floor is broken by a loud crack as a fist goes right through the wall by the stairway. Mal chokes back a helpless laugh.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
i'm ready at last
[Which is lie, there's an undeniable lightness to his step that he can't possibly hide. He's acting as if he's 21 again and fate seems to be in his reach to change it for a better future. His mood had been chipper courtesy of someone giving him chocolates, fresh batches from the kitchen they had said. He ate them all within the day, it would not only be impolite to not eat them but also he can indirectly support fellow workers in the kitchen.
Ever since then, the heaviness in his heart disappear into thin air. When he's close enough to Mallory, Luna wraps his arms around his friend. He hasn't seen him all day, and his first instinct is just to envelope him to a loving embrace.]
I just happen to have met the loveliest lady I've have seen in some time.
[His flutters when he remembers her, recalling how much her charm can be so enticing.]
1/2
-and when Luna hugs him, everything dissipates from his mind. A cacophony of new ones come flooding in all at once, making his head spin.
He's warm. This is strange, isn't it? He smells so clean. Is this the real Luna? Did he discover who left him those chocolates? Did Riye figure Mal out and tell on him? Let this last forever. Does he really deserve this after everything he's done? Don't let go. Please don't let go.
I love you so much.
He can feel his heart pounding in his ears, and a trembling hand reaches up to clutch at the back of Luna's shirt. Maybe it's the residual drunkenness, but he could just kiss him right now. He really could!
He... really...]
no subject
I just happened to have met the loveliest lady. . .
The rest is drowned out by... something. Maybe it's his pulse again, but instead of the pleasant warmth spreading through his body seconds before, his blood runs icy cold.
What about Yukizome? An age-old resentment bubbles up inside of him, and he wants so badly to tell himself that it's righteous indignation for the honour of his other best friend, but there's another thought that accompanies it. What about ME?
No-
He knew better. He always knew better. He wants to laugh, or scream or something, but he just kind of stares blankly ahead, his grip on Luna's shirt loosening. He is a little shocked that he's gone and moved on so quickly, but... it's not like he wants to see him in sorrowful mourning forever, either.
So what ABOUT me, his heart screams, and he does his best to ignore it. This is about Luna. About Luna. Everything's always been about Luna.]
...Oh...?
[That's the most he can force out right now. He doesn't actually want to hear any more of it. Not tonight. Please.]
no subject
She was initially lost, but then she stayed after we started discussing various topics and interests. She even gave me some chocolates she had on hand, I couldn't possibly refused.
[It's surprising to find someone paler than he is, but he could remember the contrasting pale skin against long, dark hair. The air around her just had beauty and elegance he has never seen before, not in the way she has.
Yukizome had been an unstoppable sunshine, but perhaps, within age, he needed someone whose more serene. His voices grows softer as he holds Mallory tightly.]
I didn't think I'd found someone so soon, but I suppose it's similar to you and Riye, we suddenly hit off so well quickly.
no subject
He's going to be sick.
His mouth is so, so dry that it's a struggle to swallow down the lump in his throat, and when he finally manages it just feels more uncomfortable than before. He pats Luna a little too firmly on the back a few times.]
Hey, that's- great. I'm glad to hear it. You lucky dog.
[Like reading words off a prompter. Lying to Luna's nothing new. He needs to get out of here before the cracks begin to show again.]
--Oh, crap. Speaking of Riye... [You would not believe how badly I fucked up tonight.] I think I forgot my wallet when we went out earlier. Tell me all about this girl when I get back.
[Except don't, not really. Mal's not going to be in any particular hurry to get back, but at least he'll have taken the time to calm himself down and accept that this is the way things are and always will be.]
no subject
He's excited to just talk more of the wonderful women he has the pleasure of meeting earlier today, his heart's ready to burst from just thinking about her and at the very least he wants to confide it to Mallory.]
Have you checked through our room and your pockets? It would be, well, unfortunate if it turns out it's been here all along.
[The grip he has on his friend's hand wavers a bit. He's hesitant of letting him go just yet.]
no subject
He never thought he'd be the one to pull his hand away from Luna's.]
No no, I remember exactly where I left it.
[He knows he never had it with him in the first place, only loose change.]
I'll be back.
[He can promise that much. He just can't say when.]
no subject
Well... alright then. Don't go out too long, I hope. [?]
no subject
[It's strange, for him to feel simultaneously heavy with grief but also like he's floating right out the door. Like he isn't even the one ushering his body down the hall, just to get him out of there, get him anywhere right now. Anything but to deal with this. If only he could wake up tomorrow and the whole day was just a dream.
He's still stunned that Luna could move on so quickly, especially since they lived in the shadow of the very real possibility that Chisa could just show up one day. It didn't feel real that Luna would cast her aside so quickly.
It didn't feel real when he tossed him aside, either.
That's right... For so long he thought that the bonds the three of them shared were unbreakable, but all it had taken was a single day for the pillars built by years of love to be crushed to dust. This was the real Luna, wasn't it? So ambitious and willing to do whatever he had to for his ideals that he would cast aside even those he called his trusted friends as soon as they stopped being useful to them.
And damn it all, Mal's still so desperate to prove that he can still be of use.
Riye said something about being put on a pedestal, didn't she? How many years had Mal raised Luna so high above himself that he was too distant to notice the cracks?
Suddenly the silence of the first floor is broken by a loud crack as a fist goes right through the wall by the stairway. Mal chokes back a helpless laugh.
Luna... When did you fall into Despair?
And why was he blind enough to follow?]