[His confusion is all more apparent as the lines of his frown deepens, while his brows knit together trying to understand Mallory's reaction.]
That wasn't a rejection.
[If that was the case, it would have been easier for him to just pull out some automated response he had come up in the past.]
You must have realize at least somewhat that what we've gone through passed intimacy between friends. [More softly, he adds;] If I really did rejected you, I would have immediately said as much.
[It's not a no, but it's not really entirely a yes either. Three or four simple words to answer back to him, yet it's easier to just string sentences that seem to carry some kind of connotation or hint those words instead.]
Mal's head jerks up suddenly, and he stares at Luna with wide eyes, their bright fuchsia brought out all the more by the flushing in his cheeks.]
So... What...?
[What are you saying, just spit it out, he doesn't want to get his hopes up. Luna's always been his hope, but this kind is just needlessly cruel! Like, yeah, maybe they kinda sorta had sex a few times but even Mal knew he was just being a stand-in for Peony. Having even the gentle touches stop the minute she arrived pretty much confirmed that one for him.
Yeah. A rejection. Not a reciprocation. Just an acceptance to let things be as they are, right? Part of him is relieved, but he can't help but want to take everything back and run anyway. How humiliating...
He clears his throat and turns his head away, spreading his arms in an exaggerated shrug.]
Alright, sure. It's still more formal and diplomatic than it probably goes for other people... I hope you didn't pull this on Peony. Ah, well. Glad that's out of the way.
That accusation throws him off enough that he briefly looks away as he feels his face heating up. The stark contrast of his normal fine complexion to the blush he's now sporting is pretty staggering. So maybe he said something similar to Peony. Maybe. He's exercising his right to be silent about it.]
It wasn't a rejection. I'm not rejecting you and I have no intention to do so. Not with what we are up to this point and not with the fact what we have done.
[It's sort of funny in a pathetic way how he's normally direct yet he finds it hard to just be upfront with this due to some factors, fumbling due to his emotions being one of them.]
[Ha ha, oh wow. It's not like Mal's never had the privilege of seeing Luna get all flustered like this, but it's been such a long time since he's seen him get so worked up in a way that doesn't involve bloodlust. It definitely isn't anger. It's cute, and one side of Mallory's mouth pulls up in a fond smile.]
So you were the one who confessed to her...
[He slips his hand into his pocket once more, staring up at the branches overhead. The breeze feels pretty good on his otherwise hot face right now...]
Do you remember the night after my big fight? You know, that whole victory celebration? [THE ONE HE TRIED TO FUCK OFF FROM?] When I asked you about her... Tch. I want to pretend like I would have said something back then if you said you two weren't an item, but I was pretty chickenshit.
[Risking mortal injury in the ring was one thing, but making his heart vulnerable? Terrifying.]
So I lied about not hiding anything from you, even then... [His brow furrows a little.] But you two were-- are happy together, right? I didn't want to get in the way then and I don't now. I just want to protect and support you. So if you're not rejecting me, great, nothing's gotta change. Don't force yourself to pretend it's anything more than that.
[He listens through what Mallory has to say, quietly and intensely as his sight is completely trained on him. Luna could tell that despite what's being said, it seem like the other man is pulling his last line of defense- he's just not entirely certain that he always knew or only realize this now.
He's not certain of anything, his own mind would argue to him.
However, he's certain that he has enough in him to come up with a rebuttal with ease. A clinical and impersonal rebuttal that can seem to simply be spoken for the sake of winning an argument based on a basic objective, instead arguing and defending his heart through his statements while also trying to save Mallory's in the process.
He's also certain that action speaks more volumes than words could ever possibly hold at times. More especially when silence and certain action cannot be explain by words alone. This is one of the things that, no matter what, remains unwavering and firm even when Luna questions the reality around him.]
Mallory.
[All he needs to say is his name and he's sure he's more likely to immediately look than looking away. And when Mallory does look, Luna is already walking closer to him; his steps are careful and slow, giving the other man a chance to run off if he wants to. A much certain he is now than most days, a tiny part of him still hesitates. But, if he feels comfort towards touch, then Mallory would too right? Or, at least possibly understand his intentions, based on their arrangement in the past.]
[It works. His gaze automatically lifts when he hears his name (or not his name, not really, and that makes it all the more bittersweet) and he watches Luna's approach, unmoving. The thought of bolting does occur to him, but he wants to see this through to the very end, whatever that end may be.]
Yeah, Luna...?
[Come on, you don't have to drag this out... Just let it be.]
[Luna has no intention to do so and with that, he closes the distance between them by pulling the other man into a warm embrace. His arms around Mallory is tight as he rests his head on his shoulder.
It certainly isn't the first of hugs, but it's most certainly a significant one in place of words that he can't really express.]
[The second he feels the touch, Mal leans heavily into it like a dog who's been left alone for far too long. Luna's embrace isn't an unfamiliar one anymore, but the mere weeks it's been since the last feels like an eternity. And this is the first time contact has been shared with his feelings out in the open like this, and the intent behind putting his arms around Luna's shoulders in return and holding him firmly.
Whether Luna's feelings are the same or not, Mal can at least be certain from this that it falls under the same umbrella term of love. This should be the happiest moment of his life... and he is overjoyed and immensely relieved, but at the same time he's all too aware of Junko Enoshima's poison running through his veins even now, staining his heart. If he'd just told him sooner... His stomach clenches, the muscles around the internal scarring over it twitching a little.
He has to let go of it. For both their sakes.
So instead of pulling away at the urging of the voice that tells him he doesn't deserve this, he buries his face in Luna's neck and inhales deeply, savouring his warmth, his scent, and his pulse.]
Well this is a lovely scene in every way: the cherry blossoms both on the trees and fluttering in the breeze, the clear blue sky overhead, the first hints of greenery appearing everywhere. It's like something out of a shoujo manga, just like Peony used to read when she'd been a young girl; everything is set up to frame the happy couple in some completely perfect snapshot of romance.
A proper happily ever after.
She's glad that she'd seen the embrace before she'd followed her instinct to call out to them; she would have hated to have ruined this. Something in her chest twists hard, burning worse than when she'd stabbed herself, and when she blinks, the entire scene blurs. No! She wants to be able to remember this properly -- the two of them happy and leaning on each other -- as both talisman and warning.
This is the right ending. This is what was supposed to have happened. Maybe, if she hadn't been selfish and let things go the way they should have, they could have avoided all of this. And now that things have resolved themselves properly, the last thing she wants to do is interfere with that. She's done enough.
So she lingers a few more seconds, just to try and burn that into her mind (remember them this way, remember that the next time you start getting greedy for the things you don't deserve), then turns and hurries off as quietly as she can. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
That wasn't a rejection.
[If that was the case, it would have been easier for him to just pull out some automated response he had come up in the past.]
You must have realize at least somewhat that what we've gone through passed intimacy between friends. [More softly, he adds;] If I really did rejected you, I would have immediately said as much.
[It's not a no, but it's not really entirely a yes either. Three or four simple words to answer back to him, yet it's easier to just string sentences that seem to carry some kind of connotation or hint those words instead.]
no subject
Wasn't a rejection.
Wasn't a rejection.
Mal's head jerks up suddenly, and he stares at Luna with wide eyes, their bright fuchsia brought out all the more by the flushing in his cheeks.]
So... What...?
[What are you saying, just spit it out, he doesn't want to get his hopes up. Luna's always been his hope, but this kind is just needlessly cruel! Like, yeah, maybe they kinda sorta had sex a few times but even Mal knew he was just being a stand-in for Peony. Having even the gentle touches stop the minute she arrived pretty much confirmed that one for him.
Yeah. A rejection. Not a reciprocation. Just an acceptance to let things be as they are, right? Part of him is relieved, but he can't help but want to take everything back and run anyway. How humiliating...
He clears his throat and turns his head away, spreading his arms in an exaggerated shrug.]
Alright, sure. It's still more formal and diplomatic than it probably goes for other people... I hope you didn't pull this on Peony. Ah, well. Glad that's out of the way.
[H A H A H A GET HIM OUT OF HERE]
no subject
That accusation throws him off enough that he briefly looks away as he feels his face heating up. The stark contrast of his normal fine complexion to the blush he's now sporting is pretty staggering. So maybe he said something similar to Peony. Maybe. He's exercising his right to be silent about it.]
It wasn't a rejection. I'm not rejecting you and I have no intention to do so. Not with what we are up to this point and not with the fact what we have done.
[It's sort of funny in a pathetic way how he's normally direct yet he finds it hard to just be upfront with this due to some factors, fumbling due to his emotions being one of them.]
Mallory, I... care about you.
[...]
That's how I confessed to Peony.
[SO YOU GET IT RIGHT.]
no subject
So you were the one who confessed to her...
[He slips his hand into his pocket once more, staring up at the branches overhead. The breeze feels pretty good on his otherwise hot face right now...]
Do you remember the night after my big fight? You know, that whole victory celebration? [THE ONE HE TRIED TO FUCK OFF FROM?] When I asked you about her... Tch. I want to pretend like I would have said something back then if you said you two weren't an item, but I was pretty chickenshit.
[Risking mortal injury in the ring was one thing, but making his heart vulnerable? Terrifying.]
So I lied about not hiding anything from you, even then... [His brow furrows a little.] But you two were-- are happy together, right? I didn't want to get in the way then and I don't now. I just want to protect and support you. So if you're not rejecting me, great, nothing's gotta change. Don't force yourself to pretend it's anything more than that.
[At least he doesn't have to be afraid anymore.]
no subject
He's not certain of anything, his own mind would argue to him.
However, he's certain that he has enough in him to come up with a rebuttal with ease. A clinical and impersonal rebuttal that can seem to simply be spoken for the sake of winning an argument based on a basic objective, instead arguing and defending his heart through his statements while also trying to save Mallory's in the process.
He's also certain that action speaks more volumes than words could ever possibly hold at times. More especially when silence and certain action cannot be explain by words alone. This is one of the things that, no matter what, remains unwavering and firm even when Luna questions the reality around him.]
Mallory.
[All he needs to say is his name and he's sure he's more likely to immediately look than looking away. And when Mallory does look, Luna is already walking closer to him; his steps are careful and slow, giving the other man a chance to run off if he wants to. A much certain he is now than most days, a tiny part of him still hesitates. But, if he feels comfort towards touch, then Mallory would too right? Or, at least possibly understand his intentions, based on their arrangement in the past.]
FINALLY, A SHORT ONE
Yeah, Luna...?
[Come on, you don't have to drag this out... Just let it be.]
AN EVEN SHORTER TAG
It certainly isn't the first of hugs, but it's most certainly a significant one in place of words that he can't really express.]
no subject
Whether Luna's feelings are the same or not, Mal can at least be certain from this that it falls under the same umbrella term of love. This should be the happiest moment of his life... and he is overjoyed and immensely relieved, but at the same time he's all too aware of Junko Enoshima's poison running through his veins even now, staining his heart. If he'd just told him sooner... His stomach clenches, the muscles around the internal scarring over it twitching a little.
He has to let go of it. For both their sakes.
So instead of pulling away at the urging of the voice that tells him he doesn't deserve this, he buries his face in Luna's neck and inhales deeply, savouring his warmth, his scent, and his pulse.]
...Thank you.
[Whatever this is, it is enough.]
no subject
Well this is a lovely scene in every way: the cherry blossoms both on the trees and fluttering in the breeze, the clear blue sky overhead, the first hints of greenery appearing everywhere. It's like something out of a shoujo manga, just like Peony used to read when she'd been a young girl; everything is set up to frame the happy couple in some completely perfect snapshot of romance.
A proper happily ever after.
She's glad that she'd seen the embrace before she'd followed her instinct to call out to them; she would have hated to have ruined this. Something in her chest twists hard, burning worse than when she'd stabbed herself, and when she blinks, the entire scene blurs. No! She wants to be able to remember this properly -- the two of them happy and leaning on each other -- as both talisman and warning.
This is the right ending. This is what was supposed to have happened. Maybe, if she hadn't been selfish and let things go the way they should have, they could have avoided all of this. And now that things have resolved themselves properly, the last thing she wants to do is interfere with that. She's done enough.
So she lingers a few more seconds, just to try and burn that into her mind (remember them this way, remember that the next time you start getting greedy for the things you don't deserve), then turns and hurries off as quietly as she can. ]